How to fake polish and pulled together-ness
We’ve all been there. In a mad rush to escape the house, we have tossed on an outfit paying no attention to a fallen hem, VPL or swing tag still attached and waving madly behind like a tail. Usually these mishaps are noticed later in the evening on arriving home. It’s upsetting and as devastating as broccoli in the teeth. It doesn’t matter if you’ve fed your family mince for a whole month so you can afford that Chloe dress. If your skirt is tucked into your knickers, you haven’t succeeded in pulling it off. Sorry, it sounds tough, but you’re not faking it unless you are properly making it.
In an effort to exude more polish and pulled together-ness, I have complied a little check-list for said nights out. It should be super-handy – if there is time to read it.
Underpinnings – Big, baggy ex-maternity undies may be comfy, but no-one wants to see them riding up the back of your JBrands. Nor do we need to need to see that bra strap slipping down your arm. Get your undies drawer sorted – ditch the uglies and invest in some good quality second skins. You will be stunned by the difference they make.
Sale stickers – That’s brilliant you picked up your Choos at 50% off. Just don’t advertise it on the soles of your shoes.
Laundry labels – Sheer tops look chic, until we can read the fabric content and washing instructions on your inner seam. Memorise said instructions and give them the snip.
Made in Italy – Lucky you, but we can see it waving Ciao to us from the bottom of your scarf. Unleash your unpicker and remove pronto.
Clothing labels – You label victim you! Only joking, but you might want to address that Stella McCartney label that is currently riding up the back of your neck. It’s just a little thing, but downright annoying. I have been known to tuck clothing labels in on total strangers. I think they appreciate it – I would.
What bugs you?